News of the Weird: Wait, what?

A 42-year-old man contacted Beverly Hills, Texas, Police Chief Kory Martin on June 13 about a package he had received from his ex-girlfriend, KWKT-TV reported. Inside was a copy of a marriage certificate, indicating that the man was married. But he told Martin that while he had been in a relationship with the woman, Kristin Marie Spearman, 36, of Waco, and even obtained a marriage license, they broke up before the wedding. After investigating, Martin determined that Spearman had convinced a pastor to certify the marriage without the groom present, and then filed the certificate at the county clerk’s office. Martin said he researched the law and found only one scenario that allows for an absentee spouse-to-be: “active military overseas, unable to make it.” And even then, “You still had to have a proxy to stand in … so (in this case) the groom should have been there.” Spearman was arrested for third-degree felony stalking and taken to jail.

Saw that coming

The Madison (Wisconsin) Fire Department responded to a boozy blaze on June 15, WMTV reported. Someone reported an oven fire around 6 p.m.; the caller told firefighters they had been cooking a turkey for about eight minutes when the oven door blew open. First responders removed the oven from the apartment, and the fire went out. They later learned the turkey had been marinated in tequila, and they believe the accumulated vapors from the alcohol were not properly vented from the oven, which caused the fire. No one was hurt (except the turkey).

News you can use

The Blue Ash (Ohio) Police Department is recommending that drivers in the area “keep the windows up for the next several weeks” after a cicada caused a crash on June 12. KKTV reported that no one was hurt when a driver veered into a pole after a cicada flew into their car; the car ended up on its side, and the cicada made a clean getaway. “These pesky cicadas don’t respect personal space,” police said. “A cicada attack can be dangerous.”

It’s good to have a hobby

Samuel Lee Thomas, 72, of St. Petersburg, Florida, is a prolific 911 caller, The Smoking Gun reported on June 16. Just in the first five months of 2025, Thomas has called emergency services 3,400 times, bringing his five-year total to 16,000 calls. His latest call involved what he said was someone “shooting an AR-15 rifle in the roadway,” but when police arrived, they found a family having a barbecue and kids at play. Anqunette Peterson, 34, who lives in the targeted home, has been the victim of his calls 647 times and said Thomas “frequently stops in front of their residence to yell obscenities at her and her family,” police said. Thomas was arrested for stalking and false report of a crime. He pleaded not guilty and was released on $1,500 bond.

Compelling explanation

Jose Manuel Perez, 24, was charged with aggravated battery on June 14 in Salt Lake City after he attacked the person he was having lunch with, Fox13-TV reported. As the assault played out, the victim tried to escape numerous times, but Perez put them in a chokehold and produced a “wooden stake with a nail in it,” telling them that they were a werewolf and “he was going to pierce their heart.” Eventually, Perez ran off with the victim’s backpack, which was recovered when cops caught up with him. Police said Perez also had rocks in his pockets, which he carried out of fear the victim would attack him. He was held without bail.

Awesome!

When Gwyneth Griffiths of Swansea, Wales, turned 102 years old recently, she had just one wish for her birthday party: a stripper. Wales Online reported on June 16 that the Hawthorn Court Care Home where Griffiths lives was happy to oblige with a “butler in the buff.” Griffiths, who has dementia, has become feisty and fun in her advanced years, spewing swear words when, her son Peter said, “She wouldn’t say boo to a goose” as he was growing up. About the stripper, Griffiths told her son, “I hope I get a cheeky pinch of his bum!” The centenarian also has a weekly wedding to her imaginary friend “Dr. John,” for which she gets her hair done and dons a tiara. When Peter told her she’d be turning 102 soon, she argued: “No I am not. Look at my t–s, not a wrinkle!” Party on, Gwyneth!

Weird in the wild

Say you’re trekking through the Namib Desert in Namibia and you get a little thirsty. No problem! According to Oddity Central, about a 20-minute drive from the main road crossing the desert is an unexpected oasis: a pink solar-powered refrigerator full of cold drinks and a little table with two chairs. Drinks are provided free of charge, and the fridge is restocked several times a day. The government’s tourist board installed the fridge in the spirit of hospitality, the website reported on June 16. So friendly.

Irony

At Difficult Campground in White River National Forest near Aspen, Colorado, camping is taking on a new look: The U.S. Forest Service has banned camping in tents or other soft-sided structures, The Aspen Times reported. Blame it on a black bear. During the night of June 9, a “curious” bear pawed at a tent with two children under age 12 inside, puncturing the material but failing to get inside. The children didn’t tell their parents, who were sleeping in a tent next to them, until the next morning. “The kids were totally fine,” a campground host reported. “They were not traumatized.” Campers using tents were relocated to other campgrounds. The order was to remain in place for two months.

Questionable judgment

The York Catholic District School Board in Vaughan, Ontario, has relieved a bus driver of their duties after inappropriate behavior, CP24-TV reported on June 17. It all started with a video posted to social media of a parent confronting the driver, who had placed a sign in the bus’s front window that said “Lolita’s Line.” “Why do you call your bus ‘The Lolita Line’?” the parent asked the driver, who was dressed in a schoolgirl’s uniform. (“Lolita” is a 1955 novel about a professor who kidnaps a 12-year-old girl.) The bus driver responds that they “do this every week. And I don’t think there’s any problem.” The school board, however, did perceive a problem and brought the incident to the bus company’s attention, assuring parents that “the driver will no longer provide busing to and from the school.”

That rule doesn’t apply to me

A 42-year-old man sustained a gunshot wound in his back on June 15 as he and friends rode bikes through the Central Catchment Nature Reserve in Singapore, AsiaOne reported. Nobody was hunting him; he was riding in an area restricted to the public and reserved for the Singapore Armed Forces live-firing activities. Several large signs read “Do Not Go Beyond This Point Living Firing Area Keep Clear!” and “Danger,” illustrated with a skull and crossbones. At the time of the shooting, the SAF was conducting an authorized live-firing activity. The man underwent surgery to remove the slug and is in stable condition.

— distributed by Andrews McMeel Syndication

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